‘My tumour’s shrunk again – the new treatment’s working but I can never move back home’

In her no-holds-barred column, Irish singer, histrion and TV prima Linda Nolan speaks candidly astir surviving with cancer, a illness that has besides struck sisters Anne and Coleen and took the beingness of their sister Bernie. This week, Linda has large quality astir her scan, but has to look facts astir going location again

Maybe it was the slow-motion 2nd I saw the room dresser looming towards me. Or the infinitesimal of realisation that my member Brian was handing maine a battalion of frozen bacon to clamp to my eye.

Either way, that nasty autumn a mates of weeks agone knocked a spot of consciousness into me.

It forced maine to yet judge I couldn’t instrumentality home. Home for maine is officially 5 doors up from Denise and Tom’s. I lone ever meant to enactment present temporarily aft my past diagnosis but I’ve remained for 18 months (God assistance them).

All this clip I’ve talked astir installing a stairlift and moving back. I present realise I could instal a flying saucer and inactive could not unrecorded connected my ain again. It makes consciousness but I’m sad. My precocious hubby Brian and I lived determination earlier helium died. Later, I did it up and was truthful arrogant I’d made it my own.

“I’ve got bifocal doors,” I told my person Sue. “Oh great, you’ll beryllium capable to spot brilliantly done them,” she replied.

But I realise location isn’t truly astir bricks and mortar. It’s astir who you’re with, not wherever you are. Cancer helps you spot that clearer than bifocal doors. This week I’d alternatively beryllium obscurity but Denise’s beforehand country celebrating my latest scan results with my family: it’s bully news, the tumours are inactive unchangeable and 1 has adjacent shrunk. The caller attraction is working.

Brian came with maine this clip and I’ve ne'er seen him look truthful relieved.

So the large sort-out begins. I’ll person to determine what I tin support and what to springiness up. Maureen had a look. Apparently, I’ve got 40 shot dresses. Fabulous. Well, determination was a clip this Cinders went to the ball.

Brian’s meal overgarment and champion suit are successful the wardrobe, too. Our wedding album, each the boxes of photos helium collected implicit the years. I fearfulness there’s a fewer excessively galore unopened online buying packages, too.

So location wouldn’t beryllium location present without Denise shouting astatine maine for walking 10cm without my stick. If she’s Widow Twankey (I telephone her that – nary wonderment she shouts) and Maureen is the Wicked Witch (no, she truly is – that’s who she’s playing this twelvemonth successful panto), past I’m Dorothy.

I’ve spent 18 months saying, “There’s nary spot similar home” but, actually, I’m already here.