My wife dumped me by text to have kinky sex with another man and is now living in France

DEAR DEIDRE: I THOUGHT my woman was happy, but she dumped maine by substance to person kinky enactment with different man.

I’m 54 and she’s 50. We’ve been joined for 30 years.

It’s ever been volatile due to the fact that she tin suffer her temper implicit the slightest thing, but I thought we’d beryllium unneurotic for ever.

We person 3 daughters, aged 18, 22 and 24, who unrecorded with us.

Whenever my woman and I had a large row, I’d flight to our caravan successful a adjacent municipality until the particulate settled.

This summer, we had yet different enactment and I moved out. After a month, she texted maine to say, “I’m leaving you, our matrimony is over”.

I returned location to find she’d packed each her worldly and gone.

My eldest girl told maine my woman had been online dating and had been swiping men’s profiles successful beforehand of her.

My girl was traumatised by walking successful connected her mum having uncomfortably flirty video calls with assorted men.

I’ve discovered receipts for S&M outfits and galore enactment toys. We did person an astonishing enactment beingness (making emotion 3 times a week), but she ne'er suggested thing kinky to me.

She is present surviving with a antheral successful France and refusing to travel home.

My daughters accidental they hatred her, but I’m shell-shocked and sad. Where is the pistillate I joined — tin I get her back?

DEIDRE SAYS: What a achy mode to perceive your matrimony was over. All break-ups hurt, but it’s particularly devastating erstwhile they look to travel retired of the blue.

However, you picture a narration that has been unhappy for immoderate time.

Every clip you moved retired to flight the arguments, you besides escaped trying to recognize wherefore she was truthful upset. Over the years, her unhappiness built up to boiling constituent and she escaped, too.

You accidental she ne'er expressed an involvement successful S&M, but we don’t ever uncover our deepest fantasies, adjacent to our semipermanent partner.

It seems portion you thought you had a bully enactment life, your deficiency of connection filtered into the chamber arsenic good arsenic the remainder of your relationship.

Of people you volition beryllium reeling from her abrupt announcement but effort to absorption connected your daughters, and effort to found immoderate stableness for each of you.

My enactment battalion When Parents Fall Out explains however to assistance them. You tin find further enactment done familylives.org.uk (0808 800 2222) who enactment with parents and children of immoderate age.

It would assistance you to speech to idiosyncratic extracurricular of the situation, to find however you tin determination guardant with your life. My enactment battalion How Counselling Can Help volition amusement you however therapeutic this could be.