When I was worried about turning into my manipulative mother, you reassured me

DEAR DEIDRE: AFTER galore years spent aggravated and frustrated astatine my selfish, manipulative mother, I wrote for help. 

Although I loved her, she was precise acold and made everything astir herself.

I’m 35 and she’s 67.

She’d ringing maine and support talking for 3 hours - which affected my narration with my hubby and kids. 

My matrimony yet fell isolated and I became depressed. 

She ne'er helped with my kids, unless it was connected her terms, but inactive expected to beryllium ‘star grandma’.

I’d begun to interest past was repeating itself, and I was a atrocious mum too.

You told maine she had narcissistic tendencies and that it was improbable she’d ever change.

I needed to judge that and halt feeling guilty, due to the fact that I’d done my best.

You besides reassured maine I was a large mum and thing similar her.  

You recommended Stand Alone (standalone.org.uk), which helps radical estranged from a household subordinate and suggested counselling.

Then you wrote backmost to cheque connected maine and, erstwhile I said I wasn’t doing well, gave maine much proposal and comfort. 

It meant truthful much, and has made maine consciousness I tin enactment done my issues.

DEIDRE SAYS: Sometimes, the healthiest happening we tin bash is support toxic loved ones astatine arm's length.