I left London for the suburbs — within a month I was begging to go back

In 2018, erstwhile I archetypal moved to London, I was a spot of a walking cliché — a 24-year-old miss from a tiny municipality nary 1 had ever heard of, with dreams of surviving successful the large metropolis and making thing of herself.

I’d grown up successful a tiny municipality successful Norfolk, and ever longed to beryllium determination bigger and brighter, with a spot much going on. 

New York was wherever I genuinely wanted to go, but moving determination is beauteous complicated, truthful the Big Smoke would person to do.

Family and friends were sceptical. They didn’t deliberation I was chopped retired for the harsh world of beingness successful London. ‘You’ll beryllium backmost present successful six months,’ a workfellow declared astatine my leaving drinks. ‘You’re excessively bully to unrecorded determination similar that.’

Flash guardant to 2023 and I’d surely proved him wrong. I LOVED surviving successful London. I couldn’t get capable of the hustle and bustle, the endless array of things to bash and spot — and don’t adjacent get maine started connected the food! It was everything I’d hoped it would beryllium and more.

Sure, determination were immoderate downsides; the insane rent prices for one, the mice, and the unbearable vigor successful summertime. But for the astir part, I was successful my element.

Then my hubby received a cancer diagnosis and everything changed. 

Your favourite idiosyncratic getting crab truly throws everything into perspective. None of what I thought mattered truly did anymore.

Thankfully country went good and helium didn’t person to acquisition further treatment. We were truly lucky, arsenic it could person been a batch worse, but it took a batch retired of him nonetheless.

Suddenly the metropolis was an emotionally and physically exhausting spot for him to be. He wanted a alteration of gait and though I was apprehensive astir it, I wanted to springiness him immoderate helium needed. In hindsight, I shouldn’t person been truthful speedy to disregard my ain feelings…

We soon recovered ourselves successful the Tunbridge Wells, looking astir a two-bedroom cottage successful the town’s suburbs. The room unsocial was bigger than astir of our flat, and it had a plot and parking, each for the aforesaid terms we were paying successful the city.

We could spot lush greenish fields retired of the spare chamber window, and adjacent Dunorlan Park seemed similar the cleanable spot to locomotion the puppy we would inevitably person to get if we moved here. 

After surviving successful an flat with a pokey fractional galley room and a chamber that was lone conscionable large capable for a treble bed, this spot seemed excessively bully to beryllium true. And connected insubstantial the municipality itself was a large acceptable for america — The Pantiles were representation perfect, it had a Gail’s and an Anthropologie, arsenic good arsenic immoderate fabulous autarkic stores (Pink Mary) and restaurants. It ticked loads of boxes.

So we signed connected the dotted enactment and successful January 2024 we packed everything into a van and waved goodbye to the location we’d made successful Kennington. 

At archetypal it was benignant of fun. We started going to the section pub connected a Friday nighttime with friends who lived nearby, we took leisurely walks into municipality to bask brunch connected the weekends, and we got to research Kent and the surrounding counties — visiting places similar Pooh Corner successful Hartfield, and Rye and Camber Sands (East Sussex).

We really spoke to our neighbours, who waved erstwhile they saw america and astir apt would person been much than blessed to lend a cupful of sugar. 

It each felt incredibly wholesome… for a fewer weeks. Just a period aft moving in, I was begging our landlord to fto america leave.

Turns retired determination is thing I’m not chopped retired for — commuting. I ne'er thought I’d miss being squished into different person’s armpit connected the Northern Line, but abruptly I was feeling incredibly nostalgic for it.

Frequent bid delays and cancellations meant I was getting up astatine 5am each time to marque it to enactment connected time, and sometimes not getting location until 11pm. I’d get in, devour something, and past spell consecutive to bed, lone to bash it each again the adjacent day. It didn’t consciousness similar I was truly living, I was conscionable existing.  

People told maine that commuting was the sacrifice you made during the week successful bid to bask spending weekends successful the spot you love. But the occupation was, I didn’t really emotion Tunbridge Wells and I wasn’t convinced it would turn connected maine either. Every clip I heard idiosyncratic accidental the words ‘commuter town’ I instantly got the ick.  

I’d liked the thought of what beingness would beryllium similar there, but that’s not the aforesaid happening arsenic really wanting to unrecorded there. I was inactive the miss who dreamed of surviving successful New York, I was ne'er going to beryllium blessed settling for suburbia. 

And I wasn’t the lone 1 struggling — my husband, the driving unit down our move, besides had regrets. 

He’s idiosyncratic who is contented being extracurricular successful nature, oregon sitting connected the sofa with a bully book, truthful this caller manner should person suited him perfectly. Unlike me, helium doesn’t get FOMO, and arsenic helium grew up adjacent London helium wasn’t arsenic dazzled by the metropolis arsenic I was. However, helium excessively recovered himself missing our beingness determination and becoming bored successful Tunbridge Wells.

He’d underestimated conscionable however overmuch helium got retired of being successful London. From booking last-minute theatre tickets aft work, to sidesplitting clip by nipping successful the National Gallery — being impulsive is tricky erstwhile you person to get the past bid home. 

And determination conscionable wasn’t capable to bash successful municipality to support america entertained. In London you’re perpetually spoiled for choice, there’s ever thing caller going on, oregon a portion of the metropolis to discover, but you tin spot each that Tunbridge Wells has to connection successful 1 day. All of the shops closing by 5pm is besides a large buzzkill erstwhile you don’t get location until 7pm astatine the earliest. 

The location itself besides wasn’t right. We missed the cosiness of our tiny level and rapidly realised each those things we’d convinced ourselves we needed — much space, a garden, an upstairs — we were really perfectly good without. 

The redeeming grace of the concern was that we hadn’t bought the house, and decided to rent instead. Even better, we’d asked for a six-month interruption clause to beryllium included successful our declaration conscionable successful lawsuit we regretted our choice.

The adjacent fewer months surely felt similar they dragged on, and I was miserable for astir of that time. Home had ever been my sanctuary, but this wasn’t determination I wanted to walk my time. I recovered myself moving aboriginal and aboriginal each evening, not wanting to spell backmost to Tunbridge Wells and I outright refused to crook 30 determination (I booked a enactment astatine Art’otel Battersea for the night, it was marvellous).

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Safe to accidental we got retired of dodge arsenic soon arsenic we could and moved backmost to London.

We thought agelong and hard astir which portion of the metropolis to unrecorded in, and this clip the determination was a compromise. Instead of being close successful the heavy of it, we’re a small further retired present successful Zone 3. We get the consciousness of tiny municipality life, without really surviving successful a tiny town.

We’re backmost to flat living, and truthful acold truthful good. I bash inactive person to commute to work, but I get up astatine a overmuch much tenable hr and conscionable person to hop connected the District Line. It’s a breeze.

Now, each of this isn’t to accidental that Tunbridge Wells is atrocious and anyone who lives determination is crazy. On the contrary, it’s a beauteous place. It conscionable wasn’t close for us. Perhaps if we’d been older, with kids and a dog, we’d person liked it more, possibly we request to get London retired of our systems successful bid to unrecorded determination else, oregon possibly we’re conscionable metropolis radical astatine bosom and this is it for america now.

Even though I hated being there, I’m gladsome we tried it, due to the fact that astatine slightest we won’t person to wonderment ‘what if?’ We admit surviving successful London truthful overmuch much now, due to the fact that we cognize what it’s similar to unrecorded determination else. 

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