I took my top off and his reaction left me feeling repulsive

As I danced un-self-consciously in the warehouse-like London gay nightclub, I noticed however the luminous greenish laser lights beamed down onto my shirtless, yet somewhat sweat-saturated, torso.

The agelong chest hair I’ve present fto turn was scrunched into choky curls that any period play heroine would beryllium envious of – yes, my thorax hairsbreadth is, basically, Elizabeth Bennet’s barnet – and each truthful often its sporadic metallic streaks illuminated nether the lights, glistening similar an aged but precious stone.  

Catching a glimpse, a chap raver past smiled in my direction.

I returned the grin and helium past boogied up to me.

Gently, with his handsome hazelnut eyes obtaining unspoken enthusiastic consent from my bluish ones, helium ran his manus through my Jane Austen-esque thorax hair.

‘Mmmmm,’ helium whispered arsenic helium stroked. ‘Love the fur.’ 

What happened adjacent was excessively steamy for an Austen romance tale, but it made maine consciousness thing much almighty than simply being fetishised. It made maine consciousness giddily validated.

It’s been a agelong travel to specified assemblage assurance and self-acceptance, but I tin present confidently accidental that I too love my assemblage hair.

I was a precise aboriginal developer and entered puberty humiliatingly young. I started shaving around the property of 13 and by the clip I was 15, I had a afloat thorax of hair.

Back past I didn’t truly cognize however to get escaped of it, oregon adjacent if I should. I conscionable knew I didn’t privation anyone to spot it. 

I believed I was excessively young to transportation specified manly assemblage developments. It felt weirdly premature, similar those kid quality queens plastered successful big make-up. Except, without the beauty. 

I felt repulsive. 

At school I’d screen myself up successful the changing rooms arsenic if I was a pistillate caught without her bra on. Even then, that wasn’t capable to halt the taunts.

Boys with appropriately creaseless boylike chests would constituent and laughter and telephone maine things similar gorilla oregon outcry things similar ‘pubes!’ at me.

It seems truthful silly now, but astatine the clip I was mortified. I’d spell agleam reddish and privation the crushed to swallow maine and my precocious body hair, similar a clogged ablution plughole.

While I became much comfy with it arsenic I got older (and my classmates caught up), successful my 20s, I grew self-conscious each implicit again but for a precise antithetic reason…

Standards of antheral beauty, backmost then, were strangely hairless. It was an epoch defined by Abercrombie & Fitch and Calvin Klein topless ‘hot’ antheral models all of whom were similar sphynx cats but with belly buttons.

It feels creepily perverted now but the selling worked and aged 25 I booked in for my archetypal afloat thorax wax.

The happening I retrieve astir astir it was the pain!

As my hairsbreadth was stripped distant from me via blistery wax, I retrieve squealing astatine an emasculating pitch. And in the days afterwards it wounded to adjacent interaction my chest.

I also retrieve feeling a abrupt affinity for the impossible, costly and achy quality standards women had agelong been expected to uphold.

But it wasn’t conscionable the symptom oregon adjacent the societal unit that made maine determine the hairless look wasn’t for me. There was conscionable thing astir it that didn’t consciousness right.

When I stood nude looking successful the reflector astatine my hairless chest, I felt adjacent much bare than I already was. I felt weirdly infantilised and, ultimately, I decided it conscionable didn’t suit me. 

So, I grew it each back and promised myself I’d never shave oregon wax it off again.

Of course, that was easier said than done. Especially as I’d inactive conscionable immoderate absorption connected the cheery scene.

One feline I concisely dated took 1 look astatine it the archetypal clip we saw each different shirtless and said: ‘Bleurgh! Wax that!’ Funnily enough he didn’t past long.

Other lovers were much diplomatic successful their distaste, and encouraged maine to ‘at slightest trim it to support it tidy.’

On the cheery scene, ‘bears’ were each hairy and overweight men and I ne'er felt I fitted into that community. And when I started going to the gym more other men would promote maine to spell hairless again, to ‘reveal’ my muscles more. 

It was then that I learnt the word ‘otter’ – a metaphor for hairy gays who aren’t positive size – which seemed to acceptable me, perfectly. 

I realised, if radical didn’t similar it, that was their problem; plentifulness of plucked chickens to take from.

After that, I yet started to ain and embrace myself, thorax hairsbreadth and all. I also realised an adjacent fig of lovers had said they adore it, and I instead focused connected their words, alternatively than the hirsute-haters.

Now, thanks to a combination of age, amended self-esteem and the power of the assemblage positivity movement, I happily fto men fetishise it. But I inactive judge much needs to beryllium done to assistance men with assemblage assurance successful general.

Just arsenic women are successfully redefining and broadening existent quality standards, men should too. We don’t request to alter, groom oregon prune our bodies to beryllium acceptable oregon attractive and I deliberation it’s precocious clip we accidental that the days of those notoriously hairless Abercrombie models are over.

I’m glad I’ve travel afloat ellipse and into a spot of hairy happiness, due to the fact that to get escaped of my assemblage hairsbreadth now would consciousness similar defacing my body. 

The lone dilemma I person present it’s going grey is: bash I dye it? I’ll fto you cognize what I decide.

Do you person a communicative you’d similar to share? Get successful interaction by emailing [email protected]. 

Share your views successful the comments below.

MORE : I spent £20,000 connected losing value – it was a discarded of money

MORE : I went connected 30 dates successful 30 nights and kissed immoderate frogs

MORE : Will Ferrell’s archetypal Netflix movie made maine hatred him – Will & Harper changed that

This tract is protected by reCAPTCHA and the Google Privacy Policy and Terms of Service apply.